Motel Hell (1980)

MOTEL HELL (1980)

Dir: Kevin Connor

“It takes all kinds of critters to make farmer Vincent’s fritters.”

I’ve always been hesitant to sit down and watch Motel Hell, mainly because I’ve seen the heads buried in the ground and thought the whole endeavor would be silly. While there is dark humor throughout, I’d never call the film silly.

Rory Calhoun is Farmer Vincent and Nancy Parsons is his sister Ida – we’d know her better as Beula Ballbreaker from Porkys. The two of them run a motel outside of town. They also smoke their own meats. People come from everywhere, just to taste that unique flavor. It’s obvious to us from the beginning that we’ve got a Soylent Green (1973) situation. We just need a bit of screentime with Farmer Vincent before we learn the secrets of his delicious recipe. Normally, the good farmer lays traps on the highway, and procures his meats. But when one of his traps springs and harms a beautiful woman named Terry (Nina Axelrod), Vincent takes her home to mend her back to health. The farmer’s getting old and looking to pass down the family business. Maybe Terry’s the right person for the job?

The film features a cameo from Wolfman Jack as a corruptible priest, a gruesome pig head worn as a mask, a chainsaw fight, dirty backyard laryngectomies, and lube kink. And you know, Farmer Vincent may be on to something: “I'm not trying to play God. I wouldn't even know how to begin. I'm just helping out. There's too many people in the world and not enough food. Now this takes care of both problems at the same time.” The only trouble is, even his meat uses preservatives. To Farmer Vincent, that’s the greatest sin you can commit.